need something to be mad about?

There are basically two things pissing me off right now, seeing as I have electricity and potable water and the streets in my town are passable and there are no hoodlums looting, and I still have a house that I can call home and therefore I have the luxury of getting pissed off about things.

Thing 1

construction of a new subdivision right behind my house.

This really is ridiculous. The dust that accumulates in my home on a daily basis is one thing, and if that were the only thing, I guess I could " suck it up " (whilst wearing a dust-mask). However. Each day it seems to be something else. For instance, the fact that these guys start work at 7am on the dot and are compelled to do the noisiest part of the day's work as soon as they get on site. Slamming things around, banging things, and, oh "gotta start nailing some shit down right away". And, these guys have GOT to be amateurs, because the manner in which they nail things has no rhythm whatsoever. Aren't you supposed to give 4, maybe five solid hits to hammer in a nail? such as, "bang bang Bang BAng and then maybe BANG"? NO. not these dudes. bang bang bangitty bangy bang bang-bang-bang. Like some kind of crazy-assed morse code or something.

Next, and oh, aren't they so considerate!, they wait until at least 9am to start this shit, but THEY PLAY THE FUCKING RADIO at volumes SO LOUD, that if my window is open, I have to TURN UP the TV to still hear the drivel Wolf Blitzer (or whomever) is conveying. Believe me, I am accustomed to filtering out background noise, since I do have 3 children, but this is above and beyond kid-volume. And I find that offensive. If, God-forbid, I venture out into my backyard, my eardrums are traumatized. But of course, they have to hear their radio above their chitty-chitty-bang-bang.

ok, i'm done talking about the construction guys. the negativity it's generating in me is just not healthy.

Thing 2

CBC radio programming

I guess I've been out of the loop for awhile, (since the end of June, when I listened to CBC constantly while chaffeuring in my capacity as SAHM), but I am aghast at what I heard today. Jurgen Goethe, disc drive, well...I used to love to hear that when I lived in Vancouver, and I guess it...well, if you're listening for pleasure, if you're listening to be soothed whilst you commute and such, it's a good thing. However. Then, it's followed by this CRAP "50 tracks". :- COunting down the 50 greatest tracks of blah blah blah blah i don't even know what. But it's crap.

So when I got home today I went to the CBC radio website, and yes, probably I should have know this, but the only media I've been watching lately is CNN, and I see that CBC is currently experiencing a labour disruption.

Hence the shit programming???? I gather. See that's what I get for not reading the newspapers. Or listening to the sports highlights when they talk about the CFL. (I despise football) Because apparently they've aired two games already with no announcers and the managers doing the camera work. heh.

Okay. Thing 1 and thing 2 have been let out of the box and now I feel slightly better.

whew. Have a good night.

PS/ as I type (it's 8:48pm) construction dudes are POWER-SAWING something. I'm surprised they didn't leave that for their 7am task...

Nicknames part 2, or...don't forget about...Jenny Mulhenny and Jellyman Kelly

Here’s a song about Jellyman Kelly,
He loves jelly the most.
Ah, but most of all, Jellyman Kelly loves jelly on toast.

And here’s the part about Jenny Mulhenny,
She’s a fireman’s daughter.
Yeah, but most of all, Jenny Mulhenny loves to boil hot water

Jenny put the kettle on, Jellyman Kelly, Can he come home, jenny, can he come?
Jenny put the kettle on, Jellyman Kelly, Can he come home, jenny, can he come?

Chorus:

Oh, can he come home, Jenny, can he come home, Jenny can he come?
Oh, can he come home, Jenny, can he come home, Jenny, can he come?

That’s the story about Jellyman Kelly-he still loves jelly!And yes and maybe someday you and me, we can have tea with him!(repeat chorus)

a rose by any other name would smell as sweet...

My youngest daughter was without a name for...roughly 48 hrs after her birth.

We were, for no concrete reason, expecting a boy, whom we would have named Peter. (Peter was my grandfather's name). A very close friend of ours died in an automobile accident 3 months before she was born, and his name was Dean. So we decided that we wanted to give our baby his name, in some form. So going into it, the name we decided on for baby, was Peter Dean.

Anyhow... it was day 2 after having the baby (who turned out to be A GIRL), and my brother-in-law showed up at the hospital to meet his new neice, and after asking what we named her, and seeing our blank stares, he said "This is ridiculous! You don't have a name for this baby?" So he sat in the armchair to my left, and Mr Brown sat in the armchair to my right, and I laid in the bed, and lovely newborn littlest female brownlette was either in her bassinette, or she may have been snoozing on top of me, but anyhow...the NAME GAME ensued. I wanted Elizabeth. That was squelched immediately. I argued for what a great ClASSIC name it was, and how it could lend itself to all sorts of nicknames... NO. Anyhow , i really don't remember what all the other options were besides Elizabeth, but it all came down to bro-in-law's suggestion of "Jenna". I guess the hot chick on "Survivor" at that time was named Jenna. hahahaha.

My point being. We named her Jenna. Jenna Dean.

Elizabeth has all sorts of options like Ellie and Liza and Beth and so on. But you would NOT BELIEVE the options we have since come up with for nicknames for "Jenna "

Jenny. Jen. Jenna Benna. Jelly Bean. Jelly Belly. Jelly. Belly. Jenny Penny. Jenna Penna. Jenster. Jenmeister. Jennie Bear. Benjer. Jenner-Benner. and the all-time, up-to- this- point- most- craziest- and- I- love- it nick-name, " Benjie Molina" (a baseball player-actually Bengie Molina, catcher for the Los Angeles Angeles of Aneheim) Benjiemolina.

I work with a girl named Jennifer, and her most abhored nickname that her mother ever gave her, was "Jeffie Bear". heh. I love it. So I call my Jen that sometimes.

I ruvs my littlest brownlette, and all the other brownlettes that contribute to the nickname craziness.
I whole-heartedly support names that lend themselves to nicknames. I just never realized that the name "Jenna" was one of them.

I'm a Baseball Fan

I didn't think it could happen, but I'm lovin' the baseball. The boys of Summer. All that.

Maybe I'm going to be like the 104 yr old lady the sportscasters said hello to on the Mariners broadcast the other night. (Except I'm starting at age 36). They said she never misses a Mariners game. Watches them all.

The D-unit was at his first major league baseball game last night in Seattle. oooooooo, I was so excited for him. It was 6:54pm, the game was going to be on TV, I had the VCR all primed to tape it for posterity.

AND THEN. the electricity went off.

I freaked.

I phoned the Hydro company. They said 30,000 people in the area were effected by the outage. I told the nice young man on the phone , "Well that certainly sucks! The ballgame is just starting, and I wanted to watch it. My son's there!" . lol. I'm so freakin' self-involved. But, what a nice guy, he actually sympathized. He said, "Oh, I'm sorry! But, power is only out on the North side, maybe someone on the South side would let you come watch it at their house". Excellent customer service, with that problem-solving suggestion. Bravo! The only snag was that littlest brownlette was already in bed. Couldn't exactly leave the little one alone, or wake her up and take her with me. Anyhow, he said the estimated time for power to come back on was 9pm.

It came back on at 8:30pm, which was a bonus. But the Mariners ended up crapping the proverbial bed in the end. The boy was still happy, though. He got a hat. And he said he was a pro photographer, got a shot of "Ichiro doing his crazy arm thing" on his disposable camera.

I ruvs my boy.

what are you telling yourself? or...what you knew, but somehow forgot...

I was given some advice, not so long ago. It was:

"When you're feeling miserable, try to be aware of what you're telling yourself"

DO THIS.

When I do it, it blows my mind.

I come up with ALOT of creepy shit that is just ridiculous.

The idea is, to make yourself the outside observer of your own internal dialogue, and just to take notes.

I'm feeling cranky, irritable, mad at the world, nothing is going my way, and then... I slip into this
" obeserver mode " and look at what this constant smorgasbord of things I'm telling myself has to offer.

Well, it's along the lines of:

this all sucks.I'll never get this all done.I can't afford this. Only losers live in this neighbourhood/drive that kind of car/wear that. That person is a moron. Doesn't anyone know how to drive? People are fucking losers. . Look at this mess. I'll never get on top of this. What a mess! I have no friends. No one would want to hang out with you, anyhow! No one understands me. I can't handle this. It's all too much. I'll never measure up. Well sure, if I had that kind of body, I could wear that. Nothing looks good on me. All the dishes are dirty and I STILL have to start on the laundry. You're never going to paint that. You could try, but you'd do a shitty job. You suck.

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH fucking BLAH

How could any spirit flourish with that kind of bullshit being hammered down on it 24/7?

My greatest wish is to be an unflinching Polyanna.

Look on the bright side. Make it a game. Turn whatever brutal, negative, judgemental shit you were thinking into something...creative! twist it, turn it, until it's a look on the brightside.

Go ahead and gag, and say I'm full of shit, but if you try it...and break the habit...you'll LIKE IT!
and I honestly believe, I create my own reality, so I have nothing to lose...

And, I used to be good at this. But I lost my edge, 6 months ago, or so.
So this post is all about trying to get myself back on track.

What do I have to lose?

heh.

omg I wanna be 4 again

Wow. Being 4 must be cool. It must be da bomb. Because Jenna has so much fun anywhere doing anything. She just goes into her own little world, and sings about best friends and horses and everyone loving everyone and it's sunshine and happiness and HOLY CRAP, I'm so jealous. Please God. Make me feel 4 again.

were you planning on posting again?

It's not that I haven't had anything to say...

Mostly it's been a case of having so much I could say that I couldn't decide where to start!

I'm probably over-thinking it. :P

My son has a new friend. A girl-crazy friend. He's 13. He's very cute, I'll give him that. And he's a star pitcher. But the girl-craziness! I just shake my head. This dude has an acute case. He's probably going to be one of these guys whose playboy ways are his downfall. Well, I shouldn't say probably. How would I know? It's going to be interesting to watch this kid over the next few years. And considering how he has glommed onto us since we moved to his end of town (he has stayed here the last 3 nights in a row), I'll likely get good opportunity to observe. However, he's staying at his Dad's house for the Summer. I think his Mom lives in another part of town so maybe once school starts I won't see him as much.

Oh, my "adoptive" son A-ron has now left town to be with his real family.

We had a going-away BBQ for him and 20 of his closest friends last night. (ok, not 20. I think there were 10) But, that many 12-13 yr olds seems like 20+. I think the new neighbours now officially hate us. Hahahahahahaha! Oh yes, and the party included girls. New friend was in his glory. And all the girls thought he was "hot". I'm rolling my eyes right now.

I can't believe how much Mr Brown loves to party. I'm not saying he likes to go out and party. But he is a guy who just LOVES to have parties at his house. To entertain. To have guests over.Even if they're kids! I just can't believe how weird it is he and I hooked up. He's Mr Socialite and I'm Ms Hermit. Ms Alexander Pope. It's retarded.

My middle child left last night on a kayaking trip with her Grandfather. Oh!!!!! There's a great topic. HER GRANDFATHER.

Mr Brown and I both worked last Friday night and Grandpa agreed to babysit. My parents do the bulk of the babysitting when I work (Mr Brown always works) but they've been doing alot and been quite busy, etc etc so I wanted to give them a night off. So we called in Grandpa. I can't believe this man took care of my children when I was in New York City for a week. *shudder*. Actually, it's good to remember that he actually did pull that off very well. Because last Friday night was a whole 'nother story!

It's shocking that I've let my daughter go out on the Ocean with this man.

Mr Brown returned home at 9:30pm last Friday to blaring music. He assumed the boy was on the computer and prepared himself to rage on him. However, after removing his shoes and continuing up the stairs he very quickly realized that the brownlettes, little girls aged 4 and 7, WERE STILL UP! Dancing around the living room! And the kitchen floor was covered in chocolate! And there were bowls from ice cream left in the living room which had been EATEN IN THE LIVING ROOM. I swear, if it had been me who came home from work to this scene I would have fucking fainted. Or unleashed a string of obscenities. Or...maybe I just would have done what the Mr did, which was usher Grandpa out quickly and in stunned silence, brush the girls' teeth, get them to bed, and pour a BIG glass of red wine.

Anyhow, the house is a very much calmer, serene, easy-going place without the eldest brownlette. That girl's a handful. I'm sure she got that from her father...